ON THIS EPISODE OF CYCLE OF HEALTH, SUICIDE PREVENTION.

IN NEW YORK, SUICIDE IS THE 15TH LEADING CAUSE OF DEATH AND 3RD LEADING FOR AGES 10-24.

HEAR FROM A FAMILY MEMBER OF A LOVED ONE LOST TO SUICIDE AND FROM A SURVIVOR, A FORMER PATIENT AT AN INNOVATIVE PROGRAM THAT BREAKS THE CYCLE OF MENTAL ILLNESS AND LEARN WHAT TO DO TO SAVE A LIFE.

MAYBE YOURS OR SOMEONE ELSE'S.

HELLO AND WELCOME TO CYCLE OF HEALTH, I'M DOCTOR RICH O'NEILL.

ACCORDING TO THE AMERICAN FOUNDATION FOR SUICIDE PREVENTION, SUICIDE IS THE 12TH LEADING CAUSE OF DEATH IN THE UNITED STATES.

AND IN 2020, OVER 45 THOUSAND AMERICANS DIED BY SUICIDE OUT OF AN ESTIMATED 1.2 MILLION SUICIDE ATTEMPTS.

STAGGERING NUMBERS.

SUICIDES HAVE BEEN ON THE RISE.

BUT THERE IS HOPE.

TONIGHT, WE'LL HEAR THE STORIES OF A SUICIDE SURVIVOR.

A FATHER WHO TRAGICALLY EXPERIENCED THE LOSS OF A CHILD, AND WE'LL HEAR FROM TWO DOCTORS WHO HAVE HELPED HUNDREDS PULL THEMSELVES UP FROM ROCK BOTTOM.

THEY ARE: DR. ROBERT GREGORY: PROFESSOR OF PSYCHIATRY & DIRECTOR OF THE PSYCHIATRY HIGH RISK PROGRAM AT UPSTATE MEDICAL UNIVERSITY DR. SEETHA RAMANATHAN: ASSOCIATE PROFESSOR & RESEARCH DIRECTOR FOR SUICIDE PREVENTION AT SUNY UPSTATE ROB HELFRICH: DIRECTOR OF THE ZACH HELFRICH MEMORIAL FUND AND DESTINEE: SUICIDE SURVIVOR & FORMER PATIENT AT THE UPSTATE PSYCHIATRY HIGH RISK PROGRAM A VERY SPECIAL THANKS TO ALL FOR BEING HERE.

AND Dr. GREGORY, LET'S START OFF WITH WHAT ARE SOME OF THE REASONS PEOPLE TURN TO SUICIDE?

>> YOU MENTIONED THE STAGGERING STATISTIC.

ONE IN 12 DYING OR THE 12th LEADING CAUSE OF SUICIDE FOR YOUTH AND YOUNG ADULTS THOUGH, THE STATISTICS ARE EVEN MORE STAGGERING; THAT SUICIDE IS THE SECOND LEADING CAUSE OF DEATH.

AND IT'S SOMETHING THAT, AS A SOCIETY, IT'S REALLY IMPORTANT THAT WE TRY TO TAKE SERIOUSLY.

THE CAUSES OF SUICIDE ARE, YOU KNOW, MANY THEORIES, BUT WHAT PATIENTS TELL ME IS THAT THEY FEEL STUCK ALONE WITH OVERWHELMING PAIN.

AND IF WE BREAK THAT DOWN, THE FEELING STUCK, FEELING OF HOPELESSNESS, AND THAT THEY'RE STUCK IN THIS RUT.

>> NOTHING ELSE I CAN DO.

>> EXACTLY.

FEELING OF DESPAIR.

AND THEN THE ALONENESS AND ISOLATION AND DISCONNECTION FROM THEIR OWN EXPERIENCES, AND ESPECIALLY FROM OTHERS, A SENSE OF ALIENATION.

AND THAT'S A VERY KEY FACTOR THAT HAS BEEN SHOWN IN RESEARCH STUDIES OVER AND OVER AGAIN.

AND THEN THE OVERWHELMING PAIN, NOT ONLY PHYSICAL PAIN.

VERY OFTEN IT'S OVERWHELMING EMOTION LIKE ANGER, SHAME, GUILT OR REJECTION.

AND THAT EMOTION THEN BECOMES WHEN THEY'RE NOT ABLE TO JUST TURN OFF THEIR MIND INSTEAD OF BEING ABLE TO IDENTIFY AND SAY OKAY, I'M ANGRY AND REFLECT ON THAT.

THEY'RE JUST IN REACTION MODE AND AT THAT POINT, WHEN THEY'RE IN REACTION MODE, THEY MAY NOT KNOW WHAT THEY'RE DOING AND THEY MAY JUST ACT IMPULSIVELY OR SOMETIMES PLAN IT OUT.

BUT THAT'S WHAT MY PATIENTS TELL US AND THAT'S-- THOSE ARE SOME OF THE TARGET AREAS THAT ARE IMPORTANT TO PREVENT SUICIDE.

>> THAT YOUR PROGRAM ADDRESSES SOME OF THOSE FACTORS.

>> ABSOLUTELY.

WE TRY TO ADDRESS THE VULNERABILITIES, TRY TO INJECT HOPE, TRY TO HELP PEOPLE TO FIND AUTHENTIC WAYS OF CONNECTING WITH OTHERS, CONNECTING WITH THEIR OWN EXPERIENCES, BEING ABLE TO PROCESS THEIR EMOTIONS SO THAT THEY DON'T IMMEDIATELY REACT.

>> AND DID YOU WANT TO ADD SOMETHING TO THAT, DOCTOR?

>> MY EXPERIENCE WITH PATIENTS IS PRETTY SIMILAR.

THE FINAL TRIGGER IS USUALLY AN OVERWHELMING EMOTIONAL PAIN, WHICH LEADS TO, IN THE MODALITY WE ARE TESTING RIGHT NOW, WE CALL IT SUICIDAL MODE.

AND RATIONAL THINKING IS LOST WHEN PATIENTS ENTER THAT MODE AND THE ONLY THING THEY CAN THINK OF IS SUICIDE TO RELIEVE THE PAIN.

IT'S VERY SIMILAR TO WHAT Dr. GREGORY IS SAYING ABOUT, AND WE BRING IN DIFFERENT THEORIES OVER HERE.

WE TALK ABOUT A SENSE OF NOT BELONGING AND A SENSE OF BEING A BURDEN ON PEOPLE THEY LOVE OR THEY CARE.

>> WHICH WOULD ADD TO YOUR PAIN, FEELING ALONE, UH-HUH.

AND THEN THERE IS REALLY SEEMS LIKE THERE IS NO CHOICE.

IT IS LIKE A RUNAWAY TRAIN AND THE ONLY WAY, THE ONLY THING DOWN THE TRACK IS SUICIDE.

>> THAT'S CORRECT.

THAT'S THE ONLY WAY TO RELIEVE THE PAIN.

>> THE ONLY WAY TO RELIEVE THE PAIN IN.

>> IN MAT MOMENT.

>> IN YOUR EXPERIENCE, DOES THIS RESONATE WITH WHAT WAS GOING ON FOR YOU THAT DAY?

>> YEAH UP UNTIL LIKE 2017 IS WHEN I ATTEMPTED SUICIDE AND I HAD BE DEALING WITH MENTAL ILLNESS AND THOUGHTS OF SUICIDE AND SELF INJURY.

>> SO WERE YOU DEPRESSED.

>> REALLY DEPRESSED FOR ABOUT SEVEN YEARS UP UNTIL THAT POINT.

AND MY EMOTIONS WERE REALLY FLUCTUATING AND ALL OVER THE PLACE.

SO WHEN I FELT SOMETHING THAT WAS GOOD OR POSITIVE, IT WOULD OFTEN TIMES JUST GO AWAY.

SO WHEN I FELT DEPRESSED OR SAD OR HELPLESS, HOPELESS, IT WAS LIKE THAT WAS THE MAIN FEELING THAT WOULD ALWAYS COME BACK.

>> THAT WAS THE BASELINE FOR YOU.

>> PRETTY MUCH.

SO IN THAT MOMENT WHEN I WAS FEELING THAT WAY, IT WAS MORE OUT OF IMPULSE BUT IT WAS JUST, I FELT THAT WAY FOR SO LONG THAT IT WAS JUST LIKE WHAT I FELT LIKE I NEEDED TO DO.

>> WHY KEEP ON WITH THIS?

WHY KEEP GOING WITH THIS KIND OF LIFE?

>> YEAH, THERE WAS NEVER ANY RELIEF FOR ME.

SO THAT FELT LIKE... >> >> SO TRYING TO KILL YOURSELF AT THAT POINT, ALTHOUGH WE ARE GOING TO TALK ABOUT THE CHANGE IN LANGUAGE IN A BIT BUT DOING THAT, THAT WAS AN ATTEMPT TO END THE PAIN.

>> YEAH, BECAUSE I HAD TRIED THERAPIES, MEDICATIONS, BEEN TO DIFFERENT EMERGENCY ROOMS, INSTITUTIONALIZED QUITE A FEW TIMES AND SO NOTHING WAS HELPFUL.

>> NOTHING WAS HELPFUL.

>> YOU HAD LOST HOPE.

THERE WAS NO OTHER CHOICE.

>> I KNOW THERE HAS BEEN A BIG SHIFT IN PEOPLE TALKING ABOUT KILLING THEMSELVES TO PEOPLE DYING BY SUICIDE.

YOU LOOK LIKE YOU WANT TO WEIGH IN ON THAT.

>> THE SHIFT HAS BEEN IN THE LANGUAGE WE USE FROM MOST PEOPLE USE THE TERM COMMITTED SUICIDE.

THAT IS VERY SIMILAR TO COMMITTING A CRIME SO WE WANT TO DESTIGMATIZE AND IMPROVE HELP SEEKING BEHAVIORS.

THE CHANGE IS TO DIE BY SUICIDE.

THAT IS THE SUBTLE SHIFT IN LANGUAGE.

>> SO TRYING TO REALLY DESTIGMATIZE HOW WE RELATE TO PEOPLE WHO HAVE DONE THIS AND INSTEAD OF BLAMING THEM, MAKE MAKING THEM FEEL BAD, HELPING THEM UNDERSTAND AND EMPATHIZE.

>> WE HOPE THAT WHEN WE DESTIGMATIZE SUICIDE, MORE PEOPLE WILL COME IN AND ASK FOR HELP AND CONNECT WITH SOMEBODY.

>> YOU ARE GOING TO REACH SOMEBODY WHO IS GOING TO BE USEFUL TO YOU RATHER THAN BE JUDGE MANYAL.

SO-- JUDGMENTAL.

SO Dr. GREGORY, IN YOUR PSYCHIATRY HIGH RISK PROGRAM, WHAT IS IT?

WHAT IS THE PROGRAM?

HOW DOES IT DIFFER FROM OTHER MODELS?

>> IT'S A GREAT QUESTION AND TRADITIONALLY, WHAT WE HAVE DONE IN THE U.S. AT LEAST IS REALLY TRIED TO FOCUS ON THE UNDERLYING DISORDERS AND SO INSTEAD OF SUICIDE PER SE.

REALLY THE LAST 10 YEARS HAVE BEEN A REALLY SEA CHANGE WITH THE WHOLE INTERNATIONAL ZERO SUICIDE MOVEMENT THAT HAS REALLY TRIED TO FOCUS SPECIFICALLY ON SUICIDE RISK ASSESSMENT AND STABILIZATION, TRANSITIONS IN CARE.

AND THEN OUR PROGRAM ADDS A REALLY U INTO ELK PIECE WHICH IS RECOVERY.

SO HOW DO WE GO TO BREAK THE CYCLE OF THIS TO GET TO THE UNDERLYING VULNERABILITIES AND SO PEOPLE CAN HAVE TRANSFORMATIONAL HEALING AND BUILD THE INNER RESILIENCE SO THEY'RE NOT CHRONICALLY SUICIDAL, CHRONICALLY DEPRESSED; THAT THEY'RE NOT IN AND OUT OF THE HOSPITAL.

BUT ACTUALLY CAN LEAD NORMAL AND PRODUCTIVE LIVES.

>> SO YOU ARE REALLY FOCUSING ON A RECOVERY MODEL.

>> ABSOLUTELY.

>> AND DEVELOPING SOME INTERNAL CAPACITIES FOR PEOPLE THAT WILL NOT REALLY JUST FOCUS ON DEPRESSION PER SE BUT ON INTERNAL CAPACITY SO PEOPLE CAN TRANSFORM THEIR LIVES.

>> ABSOLUTELY.

IT'S AN UNUSUAL PROGRAM WHERE THERE ARE ONLY A HANDFUL OF RECOVERY-BASED PROGRAMS IN THE COUNTRY.

WE ARE THE FIRST TO PUBLISH OUTCOME DATA ON IT AND WE HAVE HAD PEOPLE MOVE TO SYRACUSE FROM AS FAR AWAY AS GEORGIA OR TEXAS JUST TO BE IN THE PROGRAM.

>> SO PEOPLE ARE REALLY SEEING THIS AS SOMETHING DIFFERENT IN THAT THEY HAVE BEEN EXPOSED TO BEFORE AND THEY'RE SUCHING IT OUT.

SO DESTINEE IN TERMS OF YOUR EXPERIENCE, WHAT WAS YOUR EXPERIENCE LIKE IN THE PROGRAM?

WHAT WOULD YOU SAY ABOUT IT?

>> IT WAS DIFFERENT FROM ANY OTHER THERAPY THAT I HAD GONE THROUGH BEFORE.

THERE WAS A START AND THERE WAS A FINISH AND THAT WAS REALLY NICE.

IT'S A YEAR-LONG PROGRAM AND I WENT ONCE A WEEK EVERY WEEK AND I WAS-- I WOULD BRING UP SPECIFIC INTERACTIONS THAT WOULD HAPPEN TO ME THROUGHOUT THE DAY AND TALK ABOUT JUST KIND OF LIKE CONNECTING THE PIECES BECAUSE I HAD A HARD TIME IDENTIFYING EXACTLY HOW I FELT OR WHAT MADE ME FEEL A CERTAIN WAY.

>> SO THERE WAS A FOCUS ON PAYING ATTENTION TO WHAT YOU FELT IN CERTAIN CONTEXT?

HERE THIS IS EVENT.

>> YES.

>> AND WERE YOU LEARNING TO PAY ATTENTION TO THE FEELING THAT CAME UP IN RESPONSE TO THAT.

>> RIGHT.

>> I INTERRUPTED YOU.

PLEASE KEEP GOING.

>> THAT'S WHY IT'S SO DIFFERENT FROM ANY OTHER THERAPY BECAUSE REGULAR THERAPIES YOU JUST GO AND TALK TO SOMEBODY AND YOU DON'T ALWAYS HAVE LIKE A GOAL NECESSARILY.

YOU ARE JUST KIND OF TALKING LIKE A FRIEND.

AND IT IS IMPORTANT, THE D.D.P., BECAUSE YOU HAVE A FOCUS.

>> D.D.P.

IS DYNAMIC DECONSTRUCTIVE PROGRAM.

>> PART OF WHAT YOU ARE SAYING IS THERE IS A TIME LIMITED FOCUS THERE IS SPECIFIC SKILLS AND THERE IS A STRUCTURE TO THE WORK THAT WAS DIFFERENT THAN OTHER PROGRAMS THAT YOU HAVE BEEN IN.

>> YEAH.

>> IT WASN'T JUST GOING AND TALKING.

YOU WERE DOING SPECIFIC THINGS WITH A GOAL IN MIND.

>> WHICH CAN MAKE IT REALLY HARD, TOO, BECAUSE HAVE YOU TO TALK ABOUT THINGS THAT YOU DON'T NECESSARILY WANT TO TALK ABOUT OR MAYBE-- >> WHICH IS PROBABLY THE MOST IMPORTANT THINGS TO TALK ABOUT.

>> YEAH, RIGHT.

BUT SOMETIMES IT FEELS MORE COMFORTABLE TO NOT... >> TO AVOID.

>> YEAH.

>> BUT YOU FACE THEM.

>> AND WHEN YOU DO THAT, YOU GET-- I GOT INCREDIBLE RESULTS.

>> WE ARE GOING TO TALK ABOUT HOW YOUR LIFE HAS CHANGED IN A MINUTE.

FIRST I WANT TO GO TO ROB.

TELL US ABOUT YOUR EXPERIENCE.

>> WITH ZACH, WE NEVER REALLY SAW IT COMING.

AND THE THOUGHT THAT OUR CHILD MAY COMMIT SUICIDE WAS NEVER IN OUR CONSCIENCE.

WE REALIZED THAT HE WAS GOING THROUGH A LOT OF HIGH ANXIETY THAT WAS VERY APPARENT.

AND A LOT OF THAT ANXIETY WE FELT WAS REALLY DRIVEN BY THE FACT THAT HE WAS GOING TO COLLEGE AND HE WAS GOING TO VIRGINIA TECH AND IT WAS A GREAT PROGRAM.

HE WAS GOING INTO THE CORE CADETS, U.S. ARMY ROTC LIKE GOING TO REST POINT AND VIRGINIA TECH AT THE SAME TIME.

HE WANTED A MILITARY LIFE.

ZACH WAS A VERY EASY, HE WAS INCREDIBLY EASY TO RAISE.

HE WASN'T ON ANY TYPE OF MEDICATION, NEVER DIAGNOSED WITH ANY DEPRESSION OR ANY ISSUES.

AND NEVER GOT IN TROUBLE, GOT GREAT GRADES.

GOT INTO A WHOLE BUNCH OF DIFFERENT COLLEGES AND HAD-- WAS EASY TO RAISE AND A GREAT FUTURE.

WE NEVER REALIZED THAT THE DEGREE OF HIS DEPRESSION AND ANXIETY WOULD RESULT IN SUICIDE.

>> IT'S HARD TO IMAGINE, REALLY.

I'M A PARENT.

>> IT'S INCREDIBLY HARD TO IMAGINE.

>> IT'S HARD TO MAGICS-- IT'S HARD TO IMAGINE.

THERE IS A PART OF ME THAT SAYS I DON'T WANT TO THINK WHEN THAT POSSIBILITY.

THE THOUGHT OF IT IS JUST ALMOST OVERWHELMING, REALLY.

>> IT IS.

AND THAT'S ONE OF THE REASONS I STARTED THE ZACH HELFRICH MEMORIAL FUND.

WHEN I STARTED IT, ONE OF THE FIRST BIG EVENTS WAS THE 5K AT ABBOTT'S FARM.

THE FIRST ANNIVERSARY OF HIS DEATH.

>> PHENOMENAL WAY TO MEMORIALIZE IT.

>> IT WAS A PHENOMENAL WAY TO MEMORIALIZE HIS LIFE.

HE USED TO WORK THERE.

IT WAS A SPECIAL PLACE FOR HIM.

AND I STARTED THAT AND FRANKLY IT WAS THERAPEUTIC FOR ME AS A PARENT IN OR DEALING WITH THIS GRIEF.

BUT IT HAS TURNED INTO SO MUCH MORE THAN THAT.

AND THAT EVENT ITSELF, WE HAVE OVER 43 MEMORIALS IN THE ORCHARD.

WE CALL IT THE MEMORIAL ORCHARD ON THE COURSE.

AND 43 MEMORIALS OF LOVED ONES THAT HAVE DIED BY SUICIDE.

AND THEY'RE LOCAL LOVED ONES OR HAVE LOCAL TIES.

AND THAT EVENT, HONESTLY, HAS HELPED A LOT OF OTHER PEOPLE OR DEALING WITH THEIR GRIEF AND THEIR LOSS WITH A LOVED ONE JUST BY SEEING THOSE MEMORIALS.

AND SO IT HAS BEEN QUITE POWERFUL.

>> YEAH, SO LOOKING BACK, SADLY, BUT YOU HAVE GAINED SOME WISDOM FROM THIS EXPERIENCE.

WHAT WOULD YOU SAY TO ALL PARENTS ABOUT, YOU KNOW, IF THEY'RE THINKING, GEE, WE REALLY DON'T WANT MY CHILD TO DIE BY SUICIDE, WHAT WOULD YOU SAY TO THEM?

WHAT ADVICE WOULD YOU GIVE TO PEOPLE?

>> A COUPLE WAYS TO ANSWER THAT.

ONE IS JUST TO GIVE YOU A LITTLE MORE BACKGROUND ON THE SITUATION BECAUSE AFTER HE DIED, I SAW HIS CELL PHONE AND FORTUNATELY HE DIDN'T HAVE A LOCK ON IT.

AND I COULD SEE HIS CELL PHONE HISTORY AND HIS GOOGLE HISTORY AND HE HAS HAD SUICIDAL IDEATIONS GOING BACK MONTHS.

HE WAS OR DEALING WITH THIS ISSUE IN SILENCE.

AND ZACH NEVER REACHED OUT TO ANYBODY FOR ANY HELP.

AND SADLY, 30 MINUTES OR 20 MINUTES BEFORE HE DIED, TOOK HIS LIFE, HE WAS GOOGLING HELP ME, I'M DEPRESSED AND HE WAS LOOKING ON GOOGLE FOR HELP.

I THINK THAT 988 NUMBER WHICH WE WILL TALK ABOUT, IF THAT EXISTED IN 2019, CONCEIVABLY THAT MIGHT HAVE SAVED HIS LIFE.

BUT FOR PARENTS... >> IF 988, WHICH IS THE NEW NATIONWIDE CRISIS LINE, WHERE YOU CAN CALL AND YOU GET A PHONE TREE UNFORTUNATELY BUT THEN YOU GET A LIVE PERSON TO TALK TO ABOUT THE CRISIS YOU ARE IN.

>> SO IT'S VERY IMPORTANT, I BELIEVE, FOR A CHILD IN CRISIS TO REACH OUT AND TALK TO SOMEBODY.

>> SOMEBODY.

>> TALK TO A PARENT, A FRIEND, A TEACHER, BUT NOW WITH THAT 988 NUMBER IF THEY'RE UNCOMFORTABLE WITH ANY OF THOSE AVENUES, DIAL 988.

>> IT'S ANONYMOUS.

YOU CAN UNLOAD.

>> YOU CAN UNLOAD.

YOU ARE NOT GOING TO GET IN TROUBLE.

YOU WILL HAVE SOMEBODY TO STALK TO.

SOMEBODY WHO IS-- SOMEBODY YOU CAN TALK TO WHO IS A TRAINED CLINICIANS THAT CAN HELP YOU.

PERHAPS IF THAT EXISTED, IT MIGHT HAVE SAVED HIS LIFE.

>> IT MOO IT HAVE MADE A DIFFERENCE.

FOR PARENTS, I THINK IT'S UNCREDBLY IMPORTANT TO REALIZE THAT THIS IS AN ISSUE.

MORE RECENTLY IN JUST IN THIS PAST SPRING, THE CDC CAME OUT WITH A STUDY NAT INDICATED THAT 9% OF HIGH SCHOOL STUDENTS IN 2019 ATTEMPTED SUICIDE.

THAT IS A STAGGERING... >> THAT'S A HORRIFYING STATISTIC.

AND REALIZING THAT AND PARENTS REALIZING THAT, THIS IS AN EPIDEMIC.

THIS IS HAPPENING.

KIDS, YOU NEED TO RECOGNIZE THAT THIS COULD HAPPEN TO YOUR CHILD.

AND IF YOU SEE YOUR CHILD IN DISTRESS, JUST DON'T DISMISS IT AS A PHASE.

>> PAY ATTENTION TO IT.

>> PAY ATTENTION TO IT.

>> DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT.

DON'T BE AFRAID OF DOING SOMETHING, ANYTHING AT THAT POINT.

>> AND ASK QUESTIONS.

>> SPEAK UP AND ASK, ARE YOU THINKING OF HARMING YOURSELF OR KILLING YOURSELF?

>> EXACTLY.

>> I WANT TO TURN TO YOU TO TALK ABOUT HOW YOUR LIFE HAS CHANGED AS SOMEBODY WHO HAS SURVIVED SUICIDE.

I REMEMBER A STUDY ABOUT PEOPLE WHO JUMPED OFF THE GOLDEN GATE BRIDGE AND PEOPLE WHO SURVIVED THAT, EVERY LAST ONE OF THEM SAID I REGRETTED AS SOON AS I JUMPED OFF THE BRIDGE, I REIMRETTED DOING IT.

THEY WERE GLAD TO BE ALIVE.

YOU ARE GLAD TO BE ALIVE.

TELL US ABOUT THE CHANGE IN YOUR LIFE.

>> YEAH, IT TOOK A LOT OF TIME TO FEEL GLAD FOR ME TO BE ALIVE.

LIKE AFTER I ATTEMPTED SUICIDE, IT WASN'T LIKE I FELT GREAT THAT I WAS ALIVE RIGHT AWAY.

>> IT TOOK SOMETIME.

>> YEAH.

>> TO REWIRE THE BRAIN.

>> YEAH, BUT NOW, LIKE IT HAS BEEN LIKE FIVE YEARS SINCE I ATTEMPTED SUICIDE AND LIFE IS BETTER THAN ANYTHING I COULD HAVE EVER IMAGINED.

I HAVE QUITE A FEW DIFFERENT ACCOMPLISHMENTS LIKE PERSONAL ACCOMPLISHMENTS.

I'M A MOM NOW.

>> CONGRATULATIONS.

BEST THING IN THE WORLD I THINK.

>> IT IS.

I HAVE A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP.

I CAN, YOU KNOW, HOLD A JOB.

LIKE THINGS I COOPERATE DO BEFORE.

I HAVE A NEW CAR.

I NEVER WANTED TO DRIVE.

I WAS TOO AFRAID SO THAT WAS A BIG DEAL.

I CAN KEEP MYSELF SAFE NOW, TOO, WHICH IS A REALLY BIG DEAL.

BUT, YOU KNOW, THERE WERE SO MANY THINGS THAT I JUST NEVER THOUGHT I WOULD BE ABLE TO DO IN MY LIFE.

>> CONGRATULATIONS.

>> THANK YOU.

>> HOW DO YOU, WE HAVE JUST TWO MINUTES, BUT HOW DO YOU REASSURE PEOPLE THAT THERE IS LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL?

WHAT-- HOW DO YOU MAKE THAT KEY MESSAGE ACROSS?

ROB?

>> I HAVEN'T FOUND THAT LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL PERSONALLY.

AND, YOU KNOW, IT'S A DAILY STRUGGLE OR DEALING WITH THE GRIEF AND THE LOSS.

BUT FOR ME, FOR WHAT WE ARE DOING WITH THIS ZACH HELFRICH MEMORIAL FUND, I GET A LOT OF SATISFACTION KNOWING THAT INCREASING THE AMOUNT OF AWARENESS FOR PARENTS AND HOPEFULLY SAVING SOME LIVES AND THE MONEY WE RAWZ WITH THE FUND THROUGH THE VARIOUS EVENTS THAT WE HAVE BUILDS AN ENDOWMENT AT UPSTATE TO SUPPORT THE PSYCHIATRY HIGH RISK PROGRAM.

SO I'M INCREDIBLY HOPEFUL AND HAPPY THAT WE HAVE A PROGRAM LIKE THAT IN OUR COMMUNITY THAT HELPS PEOPLE AND HELPS YOUNGSTERS IN OUR COMMUNITY.

>> IT SOUNDS TO ME LIKE YOU ARE ACTUALLY LIGHTING A LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL, ROB.

I MEAN I UNDERSTAND FROM PARENTS WHO HAVE LOST A CHILD THAT THAT PAWN NEVER GOES AWAY, BUT YOU ARE ACTUALLY DOING SOMETHING WITH THAT PAIN TO LIGHT A LIGHT AND I WANT TO TURN TO Dr. G AND Dr. R. ANY LAST THING THAT YOU WANT TO ADD?

>> ABSOLUTELY BECAUSE WHEN PATIENTS COME TO OUR PROGRAM, THEY DON'T BELIEVE THAT RECOVERY IS POSSIBLE.

>> I SEE DESTINEE NODDING OVER THERE.

YEAH, I DIDN'T BELIEVE THAT.

>> SO TO HAVE DESTINEE TELL HER STORY, I'M HOPING WE CAN CONVINCE PEOPLE.

AND THEY DON'T REALIZE THAT THE IMPACT THE SUICIDE WOULD HAVE ON FAMILY MEMBERS.

SO TO HAVE ROB TELL HIS STORY THERE, IT IS JUST SO VALUABLE AND I HOPE THE MESSAGE GETS THROUGH TO PEOPLE.

>> DESTINEE, WHAT IS YOUR MESSAGE TO PEOPLE?

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO SAY TO PEOPLE WHO ARE IN A PLACE LIKE YOU WERE?

>> I THINK IT'S REALLY HARD TO BELIEVE OR FEEL THAT THINGS COULD EVER GET BETTER BECAUSE YOU JUST FEEL, YOU KNOW, SO AWFUL.

DEFEATED.

SO AND I THINK IT'S IMPORTANT-- I DON'T KNOW.

JUST TRY TO KEEP IN YOUR BRAIN SOMEWHERE, LIKE EVEN IF IT'S A TINY PART OF I DON'T ARE BRAIN, THAT THINGS CAN BE OKAY AND I MEAN IF YOU DO FEEL LIKE HURTING YOURSELF, ALWAYS REACH OUT TO SOMEBODY, LIKE YOU GUYS ARE SAYING.

JUST REACH OUT BECAUSE THINGS CAN TRULY CHANGE.

AND LIKE YOU WERE SAYING, A LOT OF LIKE WHEN YOU GO INTO THERAPY, YOU MIGHT NOT BELIEVE THAT IT'S GOING TO GET BETTER AND I FELT THAT WAY BECAUSE I NEVER-- I HAD BEEN DISAPPOINTED SO SO MANY THERAPIES PRIOR.

BUT MY LIFE TRULY DID CHANGE.

>> SO YOU REACHED OUT AND YOU CHANGED YOUR LIFE.

>> IT TAKES A LOT OF COURAGE.

>> CONGRATULATIONS.

THAT'S ALL THE TIME WE HAVE, BUT I WANT TO THANK OUR GUESTS AGAIN FOR JOINING US.

DR. ROBERT GREGORY: PROFESSOR OF PSYCHIATRY & DIRECTOR OF THE PSYCHIATRY HIGH RISK PROGRAM AT UPSTATE MEDICAL UNIVERSITY DR. SEETHA RAMANATHAN: ASSOCIATE PROFESSOR & RESEARCH DIRECTOR FOR SUICIDE PREVENTION AT SUNY UPSTATE ROB HELFRICH: DIRECTOR OF THE ZACH HELFRICH MEMORIAL FUND AND DESTINEE: SUICIDE SURVIVOR & FORMER PATIENT AT THE UPSTATE PSYCHIATRY HIGH RISK PROGRAM BE SURE TO VISIT I WOULD SAY NOT ONLY SUICIDE SURVIVOR BUT LIFE TRANSFORMER.

CONGRATULATIONS.

BE SURE TO VISIT WCNY.ORG/CYCLEOFHEALTH TO SEE ADDITIONAL CONTENT, PRIOR HIT ON THE TAB THAT SAYS SEASON 14, TO SEE PRIOR EPISODES AND OUR WEB SERIES CHECKUP FROM OUR NECKUP FOR CYCLE OF HEALTH, I'M PSYCHOLOGIST DOCTOR RICH O'NEILL.

THANKS FOR CHECKING IN.

NEXT WEEK ON "CYCLE OF HEALTH," THE UNITED NETWORK FOR ORGAN SHARING REPORTS THAT MORE THAN ONE HUNDRED THOUSAND INDIVIDUALS ARE CURRENTLY WAITING FOR A LIFE SAVING ORGAN TRANSPLANT AND SOMEONE NEW IS ADDED TO THE LIST EVERY TEN MINUTES TRAGICALLY ON AVERAGE, 20 PEOPLE DIE EACH DAY WHILE AWAITING A TRANSPLANT THAT NEVER COMES TUNE IN TO THE NEXT “CYCLE OF HEALTH ” WHERE A PANEL OF EXPERTS EXPLORE THE COMPLEX WORLD OF ORGAN DONATION.